It feels surreal to write this post, it wasn't one I ever imagined doing this year but my word am I glad to be doing so. The title says it all, I've handed in my notice and I finish my current job as a Nursery Nurse next month. I'd love to sit here and say it was a hard choice, and that it was debated over for months on end but that simply isn't the case, I've known in my heart since I returned to work my heart was in Babies and Beauty and that it was what I wanted to do, full time. I just didn't know how to make it possible, and the security of a stable income prevented me from taking the leap. There wasn't a big moment that made me think it's time, more a culmination of a dozen reasons.

Self employment is a scary pool to be in, you're reliant upon yourself and only you determine how successful you become. I've always been self motivated and on the whole it doesn't generally impact on me what others say or do, in terms of how I then perform. I like to do, what I like to do and that's why I think self employment will suit me well. When I started out blogging it was merely a hobby move, I enjoyed it so I kept going. I didn't ever think that one day it would become my job, it just didn't seem achievable back then because I had no idea of the income you could make. To me my blog was something I enjoyed, it still is, and I think that is the key part. Over the years I told myself that whenever I stopped enjoying blogging, Babies and Beauty would cease, something which simply hasn't happened and I can't see it veering that way in the future. I really do enjoy it, would it be too cheesy to say it's my passion? It seems so cliche as I don't think I've ever felt passionate about something like this before, a career that I'm really excited to wake for in the mornings and get stuck into.

I've had a lot of people ask me why I'm doing this now, why not wait for the new year, or why didn't I just do it straight from maternity leave, but I think had I not returned to my current job, then I don't know if I'd have given blogging my full attention. Patrick wouldn't have ever started nursery, and I fear I would have become stuck in a juggling act situation that none of us would have enjoyed being in. Now I've had a taste of what employment is like again, I'm determined to make self-employment my long term future. Noah begins half days at school in January and I want to be a present parent, I want him to look out during assemblies and see my face at the back, his personal cheerleader. I want him to know that when he finishes school, if he's had a bad day, I'm right there in the playground with open arms waiting for him. If he's poorly that day, and the teacher has to call, I don't need to negotiate my way out of work or feel bad for taking multiple days off - they are my sole priority and I don't have to juggle them with anything. Of course, working for myself is still incredibly important, but it's flexible and though my current employer has been beyond what most are, being self employed offers perks no other job role could. I can stay up late and finish off those photo edits that need doing, we don't have to leave the house pre 7am, and we'll all be home long before 6pm. It's a huge lifestyle change but one that I think is in the right direction for us. Being a work from home Mum won't come without it's challenges I'm sure, figuring out that work, life balance will be a big adjustment and ensuring that I prioritise correctly without getting complacent. I'm not naive, thinking this is all going to be events and sitting in costa replying to emails, I know that the first year is always the hardest and it's probably going to be a long slot. But regardless of all those hurdles, I'm so excited to begin this journey, it's new, it's challenging and I can't wait.

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